Tough love and winter storms


Just yesterday the world seemed a little darker than usual. I was on the phone with a friend of mine talking about a situation that was weighing on me. When problems occur I like to fix them, considering worry to be a waste of energy. It gets a little more complex when it’s not you that has the problem but someone dear to you. Over the last 9 months, I had been supportive, at least as much as I know to be. The situation didn’t change. We tackled some symptoms but didn’t deal with the root cause. He wasn’t ready to deal with the root cause.

Tough love is a concept that usually works well on me. As long as people are being understanding, openly loving, comforting it is easy to brush of issues as non-existent or life not being ‘half bad’. Once I realise that others aren’t willing to support a self-pity approach it melts with my own belief of being in control of my own life. Having said that, I am not very good at giving tough love. And so as I was explaining my current crux to my friend, I still was undecided whether a ‘kick in the butt’ would not cause more harm than just being there and focusing on not getting too drained in the process.

“I guess it comes down to a question of trust”, I said to her. “I should trust that if I give my true best and do that with Love that he will recognise that, no matter what approach I take. And I should remember to trust that life has this way of turning out just fine, if we choose to live it”.

(By the way my friend: thanks for listening).

I ended the phone conversation with her and not 5 minutes later got a phone call. The person in question had decided to tackle the issue head on and I could hear his happiness. Yes, life has this way of turning out just fine.

Like this morning, as I wake up to another winter blanket covering the ground. It is winter and therefore at least in this part of the world it is supposed to snow once in a while. So all you winter complainers out there, if you don’t like it than move to Australia or the Caribbean. You have settled in a 4 season part of the world, so winter is your own fault. And if you really need to keep on complaining, do us snow lovers a favour and do it inwards. Try smiling, it helps.


~ by spasmicallyperfect on February 2, 2008.

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